This is a great article to remind us about the unintended (mostly) messages that we send new mothers every day. I know that with my first child – who was born with PMS!!! – I always felt like I was doing things wrong. I feared that my every decision would ruin her life forever. And I am a developmental pediatrician!
Now think about the effects of your comments on parents with children experiencing developmental and behavioral challenges. You are not in their shoes. You don’t know what they have tried and not tried to “get” their child to behave or do their school work.
And what about the things you say to the child who is struggling? I have actually talked to these children and teens for the last 30 years and they all say the same thing. “If I could be who you want me to be, I would do it in a second.” They hate being the focus of criticism or pity. They want to be competent. But it is not coming naturally and no one is taking the time to teach them or find someone who can.
Let’s think harder before we speak to others. Think about our intended meaning and the possible other meanings that may be taken from what we say. You just may help someone feel loved, accepted, and respected.
The link didn’t make it on the post, so here it is: The Worst Things You Can Say to A New Mom
See on m.yahoo.com